Circling emotions
by BreakingTheHarmony
Summary: jynx lives in twilight town. But she never would have guessed her life would turn upsidedown so suddenly
1. Bright Start

KH fanfict Ch1:Bright Start~

Blinding, pure white, casting it's light outward into the endless sky, painting it's colors for the world to see it's brilliance. The morning's light rising and setting the world into an awkward arouse. Inhailing the scents of fresh morning dew and new sunlight, I knew today would be the final day, my last questions would hopefully be answered.

Feeling confident, I made my way to school. The many circling conversations hushed themselves in the soft morning whispers, before the boring school hours that so many had before hated would finally start. My classmates continued their hushed murmurs as I skimmed them for that one certain person. Finally I'd found him. I ran since my time was limited in the short burst before the school bell would ring.

His pure white hair had flown gracefully around in the morning wind as it beautifully framed his god-like face.

"Riku?" He looked over my way with his tinted emerald eyes.

"Hmmm?" he chimed.

"R-riku, um, I've wanted to ask you something for quite some time…." Something flickered across his face that I couldn't quite recognize.

"Whatever, Shoot…." he said ever so calmly as he fixed his school bag around his shoulder.

"Um, d- do you…..Do you know, like me?" I asked, blushing up a storm. A frown flickered across his face then it returned to his regular calm, cool, defense.

"actually, matter of fact, no, I don't."

…It was a painful silence…

For a moment I processed what had just been said to me. Then, I felt tears well up in my eyes. I tried not to let them show in my voice.

"Oh, well, thank you for letting me know how you feel." Slowly I turned around and walked in the opposite direction; And somehow, I think I herd him mumble to himself,

"Good Going Riku, make yet ANOTHER girl cry for you. And after all she went through. Way-to-go-Dumb-ass…"

By now, I literally ran through the school yard. Suddenly I felt someone grab my arm. I turned.

"Jynx, what's wrong?" Just his voice sent the emotions I'd already had into a painful full power.

"Sora, it's nothing….." I whimpered with tears in my eyes.

"If you're crying then it's not ok." he countered. "Wait….Is it Riku? You told him?" he'd figured out the whole problem in no time flat.

"Sora," I started." I-I just- leave me alone! I don't know anymore!" Then I ran farther. With my heart and head pounding at the same annoying wavelength I plowed through the street. So many painfully stared in my direction. Only a few had gotten out of my way before I'd run them over.

I made it to a small cliff that hung itself just above the ocean. The scents of pure fresh sea-salt filled my senses as I breathed deeply. The two emotions circled the air around me anger, and sadness. They mercilessly ate at each other, one after the other.

Had I ever been so wrong….What was it that people hated about me so much? Because I'm myself? I don't know what the problem with that is.

I pulled a star-shaped fruit from my bag.

"To HELL with this!" With all my might I threw it into the killer ocean. Violently it lurched forward, destroying the delicate fruit. I'd had enough…..

The wind that shot itself from the over powering waves blew my thick midnight hair all around me as I stared over the dusty horizon. Rocking slowly on my heels, back forth, back forth, then I let my feet stray from the ground. I felt the wind whisk around me even faster. Then it stopped.

Did I die that quickly? Was that even possible? I wasn't dead, and I hadn't completely fallen. Someone had caught me before I met my end. Who ever it was lifted me from the hanging ledge. Riku's eyes met mine. Why in all hell did he save me? He had said it himself, he didn't like me that way.

"What were you thinking! Throwing yourself off a ledge like that! I almost didn't make it in time! You would have died!" Tears still streaked my face.

"You said it yourself, you don't like me the way I like you. So why not?" I stared him straight in the eye. Riku pulled me onto a rock. He sighed quickly. But I'd cut him off. "You should've dropped me."

"No I shouldn't drop you off a cliff." He spoke as if I was a child and he had to teach my that was a 'no-no'. "Listen, I REALLY do like you." That started my stuttering like an idiot.

"Y-you D-d-do?"

"Yes, I do."

"But I-I-I "

"Honestly, do I have to prove it to you?"

"No, but-" Riku stopped my idiotic babbling by kissing me ever so softly. He pulled back.

"There, believable enough for you?" He smiled gently.

Unable to speak, I just nodded. Tears spilled over my cheeks again. Then, I woke up.


	2. Chapter 2

CH2: A Shattered Memory~

I shot up in bed, sweat was dripping down my face, my sheets whistled with the sudden motion. Shocked and shaken, I covered my eyes. I didn't want to see that my dream had suddenly returned to life and morphed into a nightmare. I felt the nagging moisture build up in my eyes, I tried to fight it. But it just didn't work. Tears spilled over my cheeks, I could taste their saltiness as my nose started to run.

"God Damn It!" My voice broke from my violent tears. "Why!" I took my hands from my face and balled them into fists as I angrily slammed them onto the bed, making the old and possibly broken springs clank with the pressure. I glared at my ugly ceiling, my tears never stopped flowing. "Why did you taint my thoughts with him! Why did you kill my family! Why did you take all that I had for happiness and crush it! RAGH!" Yet another morning starts off with me screaming and yelling at something or some one that probably didn't even exist. Having that dream over and over again was pure torture. Even though it continues each and every night, I still think it's real. I'm pathetic. Beyond that even. For no reason at all, I'm obsessed with him, and I can never see why. Again from receiving a blank response I let my tears dry out.

I lowered my head down to it's regular level and stared at my old fashioned alarm clock. 1:06 A.M hunh? Just before I swung my legs off my bed I took a deep breath and let it out loudly. The second I hit carpet I made my way to my laundry room and grabbed two fresh towels and headed for the shower.

Standing underneath the water helped awaken my dulled morning senses. Frisky steam nibbling at the air, the hot water warming you from inside out, and the yummy scents of soaps and washes, nothing could compare.

After washing my face hair and body I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. Like always, I pulled one towel into my hair and wrapped the other around myself. I scurried into my room so I could change into my uniform. A white polo button shirt and blue tie and blue skirt with black knee-high socks and brown loafers. Plain and simple, just the way I like it. But I also add the black and purple ribbon choker my mother had given me on my first birthday.

"SKWAK!" My pet raven Miki pecked at my window and crowed loudly again. Miki had been my pet for a long time, he and I would talk in the mornings and nights before and after school. It's not like he could talk back. It just feels that way. I put my finger to my lips, "Miki! Shush! Do you wanna wake up the whole town? I'll be out in a minute. Keep your feathers on." I loudly whispered to him. Running out of my room half way tripping down my stairs and getting out the back door was like a morning race for me, myself and I that I would hold every morning just to get Miki to stop pecking at my widow. One of these days it would break because of that bird I swear it. "SWAK!" Miki gracefully flew toward me and landed on my shoulder. He pecked at my right ear, witch normally meant 'good morning'.

"Morning' to you too." I laughed. Walking over to my wooden swing I sat down. My house was old. It was the one me my parents and my brother lived in. It's really sad how I can even remember their faces or names. The only one I can remember is my brother. Well, sort of. All I can pile up I that he was my age or so, a little bit shorter than me and he had spiky brown hair and blue eyes. Nothing that could really be of use to me now, but it's nice to know that I remember at least a family member of mine. Miki and I 'talked' until about 7:00 then I had to gather my things and make my way to school.

I herd the other kids walk down my road (it leads right to the school you cant get there unless you go down my road). If only I could tell him. Maybe I could work up the courage to tell him. But what if he turned me down? Then what? Something told me to turn around. Normally I don't follow instinct, but this time things just HAD to be different. The first thing that entered my vision: Kairi and Riku, holding hands as they walked down the road. Riku's eyes met mine directly. He knew I could see what was going on. The look on his face was triumphant. Like he wanted to make me feel like I'd been round punched in the stomach 50 times in a row. My stomach curled, my heart beat fast, and I felt like I was going to throw up. I'd always known that at some point in time she'd become the enemy. At one moment she'd be my opponent it this so called war. It just hurt more because she was one of my only friends.

I still couldn't believe it. The shock was too much. I ran into my back yard, huddling up into the corner I put my arms around my legs. Pathetic, pathetic, pathetic. That's all I am.

"Jynx? Heyyy Jynnx? Where are you?" Sora childishly carried the notes as he called for me. I didn't want to move. Suddenly Miki swooped down from the top of a tree and landed on my knee. I stared into his eyes. They'd changed, the whites had turned bloody red and his pupils looked to be milky white skulls. They were terrifying.

"SKREEE!" His call was a possessed half pain half warning demonic cry that would have sent the devil running out of hell with his tail between his legs. The sound waves ripped and tore anything else that wasn't it's own. Ear splitting and I seemed to be the only one that could hear it. For no reason at all I was suddenly paralyzed. My body was forcibly pressed against the thick green grass.

"Jynx!" Sora came through my front yard and stopped dead as soon as he lay his deep blue eyes on me, they didn't leave me for a second. "Hey, are you okay? Jynx" Sora's voice was gone. I could see his lips moving but sounds had been erased for me. Color then was sapped from my vision the moment I blinked. Sora didn't know what to do. He was more worried than I'd ever seen him before in my life. He was looking around frantically. Sora called out for someone then Riku and Kairi came rushing in. no one knew what to do.

Riku ran over to me then kneeled next to me. He was talking to be and trying to calm me down bat all of his attempts to reach me failed. I couldn't read his emotions correctly. Scared. No, bitter. Embarrassed. Confused. I'm the confused one. Riku laced his finger through mine and on the second look, I could see that my hand had disappeared. It was just gone I could feel riku holding onto me but my hand was gone. There wasn't any blood. just dark wisps of blackness. Cold blackness. Tears rolled down my face. They were thick and black. I hadn't even noticed I was crying. Why are they making such a fuss over me? I'm nothing to worry about. If I was gone the world would just keep going.

I was almost erased.

I don't know why…..

….Gone…

I'd been completely destroyed

"Jynx" A deep dark voice called my name through a pitch black sea. "Come to me. Help lead our way to Kingdom Hearts."

"who are you?" I tried to speak. Nothing was really understandable. Just like speaking underwater. Bubble, bubble, bubble.

Suddenly it was becoming difficult to breathe. Air…I need air….Help me…..It burns. I need air.

Nothing to taking and nothing to let out. It's painful.

My heartbeat is slowing….

Dieing…...

B-bmp

b-bmp

Bmp

Bmp

Bmp

B…..

B…...

…...


	3. Chapter 3

CH3 A Lost Soul~

A castle so huge it was unimaginable, floated upon just enough ground to hold it's self just above cotton clouds. Everything was still. The wind didn't blow even though the sound of it whistled through the air. My life was still sapped of it's beautiful vibrant color. I was out of water, but now I was stood upon air. Just as if it were stairs.

A familiar skwak aroused my bleak thoughts. Hearing him but not seeing him was frustrating.

SKWAK! Again, it pierced my ear drums.

His calls were mocking and devilish. Slowly, cautiously, I walked upwards to the castle. Miki's constant skwaking made me somewhat lightheaded. It was something I recognized but the memory was slipping away. Getting fuzzier by each second that passed. My vision was splitting. Finally I'd hit solid ground, or what seemed to be solid.

Standing through a thin screen of smoke, a figure draped with a black cloak stood motionless at the entrance of the castle. Two wheels of silver and were placed in it's gloved hands. A male's voice echoed from it,

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" Anger and a hint of confusion colored his voice. He sounded like this wasn't where he was supposed to be, like he'd found the wrong person. He was like a lost child looking for his mother. "What's wrong with you! Why won't you answer me!" Rage was in his voice like I'd put a red sheet in front of a bull.

I opened my mouth, I wanted to speak, but I just couldn't make the sound. I shook my head repeatedly as I mouthed the word 'no'.

"So now you mock me?" He was far beyond anger at this point. Suddenly bright flames erupted from the ground. Color exploded back into my vision. I felt myself hit the ground (witch, I now know is very solid). By a delayed reaction, I snapped open my watering eyes. Green cat-like spheres with an intention to kill stared right through me. The razor sharp edge of the blade on the wheel made a shallow cut through the right side of my neck. If I would have moved even half an inch I would have been beheaded. I noticed the cold almost wet dark vapors rising from my cut.

I didn't want to disappear again. Not ever for that matter. Again, I can't move, I can't scream, so what can I do? A voice I recognized caught my attention.

"8, that is NOT how we welcome new members to our fine organization."

The man stopped trying to kill me to then get a better look at my face. He got up and was motionless. "Fine." he growled. His chakrams disappeared in white sparks. I couldn't move and I didn't want to. The other figure was suddenly next to me. It flipped it's hood. Dark skin, orange eyes, and white hair.

"14. Are you able to stand?" He asked as he held out a gloved hand. My hand shook, but I took his. Suddenly he caressed my neck where I'd been cut. Dark smoke curled at his fingers. I violently shivered. He licked at the darkness upon his hands. It was a creepy look of happiness and anger it was like a dark angel's deathly smile. My knees suddenly gave out and I was flying forward. The strange man caught me as I landed on his thick chest. A black tear drop rolled down my face. Then it turned into a horrific sob that I couldn't control.

"Don't let me disappear. I don't want to die." I squeaked between shallow gasps for air.

"child, I won't let you disappear. It won't happen, I assure you." He held me close. A very disgusted "Ahem" came from the other figure. He let me go and stood me up. "Follow me 14." he gave me a soft gentle smile as he reached for me. I took his hand once more. Then, he lead me into the castle.


	4. Chapter 4

CH4FreshMeat

I was cloaked in black robes, like the others, I was the same, but just another clone. My hood was over my head, from the fear that they might learn my face. These strangers for all I know, could kill me( one almost did already). "Child." I starred up. "you will have to share a room with another member, do to lack of space." Do to lack of space? Hell. He's just trying to put the mouse in the snake's cage. I should just grow buck teeth a tail and big round ears! Despite my knowing that death was awaiting me behind all of these shadows, I nodded and pointed down the hall. "8 has already offered to have you stay with him. Your room is the last one to the right good luck" and he gave me a strong

push that sent my tripping over my own two feet. Luckily, I caught myself before I hit the wall. When I looked back he was gone. Violent shivers tore at me. This place was just plain creepy.

Walking down the hall I starred at each door to memorize my surroundings. I stopped in front of the door to my new 'room'. giving myself a mental shake, I inched my hand to the door knob, and turned it. I creaked the door open just enough so I could see into the small room. No blades or spikes that would come up from the floor, it looked…..normal. A bed and a small glass coffee table. Taking my chances, I opened the door just a little further, and I stepped into the room. Feeling kind of bird-like, I looked to the right, the left, up, and down, scanning for danger was an old habit. A few steps further. Nothing out of the ordinary- wait. Who am I kidding? Ordinary? Fine, something that was too weird to be in this world of weird.

A chakram I knew all too well came flying from nowhere, luckily this time, I dodged it.

"supp." the red-head from before stood in front of me with a cat-like smile of sheer victory. Wonderful, the man who tried to kill me, is now my new room mate…..I'm so dead.


	5. Far Off Dream

CH5 Far Off Dream

I herd my spine crack as he shoved me into the wall.

"supp' little pig?" A cocky smile spread across his face, you could practically see the arrogance rolling off him.

"Well," I struggled, to get out of his grasp, but quickly discarded the idea the moment I first tried. It only made it worse. "Lets see, I've seen the boy I'm crushing on with another girl, my pet bird turn into a demon crow, disappeared, herd weird voices in my head, almost get killed, by **you **might I add, randomly notice I'm NOT wearing my school uniform, walk into my room, figure out my roommate is the guy that tried to kill me, and then get shoved into a wall witch possible broke a part of my spine, wondered why I'm not dead yet because I've been in the middle of the ocean and been bleeding black wisps of dark stuff and for the first time I've been called 'Little Pig'. Anything else you'd like to know while I'm at it?" I was out of breath from saying it all of my troubles and the man started laughing. Not just a "Tee hee that was funny" but a "". "What?" I growled, what the hell was so funny? He suddenly stopped.

"What's your name?" He asked flatly.

"Jynx?" In all of my 13 years I've never seen such an awkward man. Then he began laughing **again**. Dear god, my roommate must be a Crack addict. Either that, or has some serious brain problems. Lets go with brain problems, I don't think that I want to lose anymore brain cells than I already have. "What NOW? What is so gosh darn funny that you have to laugh like a mad man!" again, he stopped.

"Ok, for one, you just told my your whole 'life story' and then told my your real name. what? Are you not smart enough to know that you should use a fake one?" he smiled, again simply oozed arrogance. Ugh, men.

"Ok, then, what's your name?" I asked. He stopped. His eyes were almost statue-like as they starred at me.

"Axel. A-x-e-l. Got it memorized?" he got so close, his nose almost touched mine. My eyes widened at our closeness and the fact that he had just told me his real name. how'd I know? I didn't.

"and you ask me if I'm smart enough to use a fake name then you tell me your real name? that's…" I stopped, at a loss for words. "kinda cheesey." at this point he was so close I swear I was going cross-eyed.

A smile broke across his face. "you sound like a child."

"Oh, and you don't, Mr. Pedo Who Picks On Little Kids ?" I tried to doge most of his face as I stood on my tip-toes, trying that old bigger scarier trick. Axel suddenly punched me in the stomach, making me drop to the floor.

"Did you spend all day thinking of that one?" he frowned again as he starred at me, clutching my stomach in pain as I tried to catch the breath he knocked out of my lungs.

"No," I croaked as I kicked him square between the legs. He fell to the floor. I got up then kicked him in the stomach. "Pedo-Bear." walking toward the window I opened it at called for Miki. It had only been a few seconds but I felt Axel breathing on the back of my neck. Just then Miki soared through the window, I ducked so I wouldn't get a face full of bird. Axel didn't. He got a good peck to the face. I starred at him as he tried to shoo Miki away, but he kept hovering overhead, swooping in every few seconds to pull Axel's hair or peck his nose.

"what is that thing, a heartless!" axel yelled as he continued trying to batt Miki out of the air.

"a heartless? No. Miki is a bird. My pet bird." though, on a second look, Miki did kind of look to be the size of an eagle, not a crow. That and his feathers did look a little darker and his wings a little bigger, but that was probably what this creepy world did to him.

"well get it away!" axel snarled as Miki pulled his hair.

"what do you say?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips.

"God, you ARE a child!" Axel clawed at Miki, but missed every swipe.

"Mik- Kiss Kiss." I crossed my arms over my chest as Miki bit Axel's nose and refused to let go.

"OWWW!" he yelled as he tried to get miki to let go.

"what do you say?" I repeated.

"I don't know!" Axel yelled in frustration.

"HMMMMM,"I hummed still waiting for an answer. If he kept that up Miki would be on his nose for the rest of their lives, and Miki had a few good years left on him.

"Please get this goddamn bird off of my nose!" not exactly the phrase I was looking for, but it worked.

"Fine. Miki." I snapped my fingers, and Miki let go of Axel and retreated to my shoulder. There was a triangle shaped mark on Axel's nose, that wouldn't be embarrassing. Not at all. I smiled.

"Jesus-"

"think about your words." I warned as Miki ruffled his wings. Axel's mouth shut. For a moment we starred at each other from each end of the room, daggers in our eyes. I pet Miki and he flew out the open window, knowing that was his signal to leave me alone. Axel stepped for ward. I stood my ground. Another step, then another, then another, a few more and he was right on top of me again. Suddenly he held me in his arms, and once more our noses were almost touching. I went a little cross eyed again and blushed a little bit. Axel's breathing was heavy. His lips locked with mine and we went crashing to the floor. My head cracked against the cement, but I didn't care. Even though my head was possibly bleeding. Then a small but important thought ran through my mind, 'what about Riku?'

Who cared? He didn't, that was about all that I knew. If I was touched by this random stranger? No, he wouldn't care because he hates me in the largest definition of the word.

A kiss a touch never enough, so hot, so soft, don't stop- once you start.

Boy meets girl, know what to do?

Let me interact! How can I connect?

Hit me~ hit me~ human connect to human.

How can I connect to you?

You and me know what to do!

How can I connect to you?

I stopped. I pushed him off of me. "What do you think that you're doing!" I yelled at him. My brain had completely dodged the minor- make that MAJOR fact that my cloak was unzipped, at least down to my belly button. Blushing, I sipped up my cloak.

Axel was on his hands and knees, just a few inches from my face. He suddenly looked away.

"I-I don't know." he whispered, obviously astonished at his own idiotic actions. I crossed my arms over my chest. Not to seem angry but to protect myself. Only god knew what could have happened.

Not only had my new roommate tried to kill me, he also tried to rape me. Survey says,

"You're Screwed =)"

Wonderful.

…**...**

**Supp, this drove a little from the original story line (not like any of you give a rat's petunia) but yeah. The song I added was "Human Connect To Human" by Tokio Hotel review if you like them :3 the point of this was to mostly show ezu321 that Axel AND Riku are mine :3 I love ya hun but I called them first I'm being lazy, so I might not update for a bit... later -KNW**


	6. Chapter 6

Bad Dreams CH6~

That night i slept on the floor. Touching that bed was utterly out of the question. Was the cold hard floor any better? Well, aside from a slight back ache, it was okay. The Jack Rabbit was kind enough to give me a pillow and a torn blanket. But still, i never knew castles could get so cold.

Falling asleep was difficult. Soon enough my mind finally shut up and I found myself in dream land.

_What are you waitirng for?_

A dark voice channeled and bounced off of nothing. But truly, what was I waiting for? What was my big plan? I didn't have one. 'Who are you' 'what are you talking about?' i tried to make a connnection. Silence. 'answer me...Please'

_why is it yours?_

'why is what mine?'

_His heart_

'Who's heart'

_Light_

light? no...I've herd that somewhere...

_My light. I am the darkness that once was his._

'what's your name?'

_Vanitas...I know of you, Jynx...why do you not know of me?_

The darkness. I'd never thought about it before...does it have a physical form? Is it where this voice belongs?

_Lea has feelings toward you_

Who? I'd never met a Lea...Was he some kind of stalker? It really wouldn't surprise me. 'Who is Lea?' "why are you telling me these things?'

_Are you deaf and blind? What i don't understand is why my- Our heart was passed to you_

'What are you saying? My heart belongs to me!' Pain ripped at my nerves.

_Be cafeful, you're words could have you killed. I controll your power, for it is my own._

It felt as if someone was choking the life out of me. Dreams aren't supposed to hurt...Dreams set you in a daze...They take away the pain and the fear and replace it with somwthing warm...soft...your need it. It's reasurance and comfort, you feel safe. Ugh...I'm drowning...in my own agony...my own blood. Air, I need it. nothing can end the pain! It's claws are at my throat...Slice, tear, ripp my flesh! Drain me of my own existance, take away the pain until I'm nothing but a carcass!

_You truly are weak._

The pain stopped. Sweet oxygen returned to my lungs, the fire was put out. 'What if I am? Why is it so important that I'm strong?' Quickly i cringed, instantly wanting to take back my words, in fear that the voice would make the pain return.

_thats just it. The weak. I HATE the weak. Don't you? Avoid it at all costs, have power within you, even if it could mean your end._

**I'm asking you. As a friend. Just...Put an end to me.**

VENTUS. No...It's Sora...But who is Sora? Rox...Roxas. Vanitas. What is the light and what is the darkness. Good or bad? They both have a purpose that they belive in...Dosen't that make it worth fighting for?

_Do you remember? Are his memories flooding into your mind...Our mind._

'What are you talking about! I'm me, my body is mine, and I don't care if you put me through the worst torture possible! You can never have whats' mine!' Again the pain came. It was worse. Beyond what can ever be humanly felt. My body burned. My skin stung, even the slightest twitch would make it crawl. A Blood curdiling scream wrenched itself from my chest. I flailed and kicked. "Let Go, Leave Me!"

"Jynx!" My eyes shot open and I was back in the castle. Axel tightly gripped my arms and had apparently pinned down my legs. Wet tears streaked my face. "wake up! You're Okay!" He let go. I didn't move. I fell into his arms crying and shaking.

"It hurts...It hurts so much." I whimpered. Once again, I'd fallen into his arms looking for help that he couldn't give me.

I'm such an idiot.


End file.
